Avyrii Johansson

Cheese. My mortal enemy.

For too long have you smited me with your deliciousness and your calorific nature. Protein filled though you may be, I see you for who you really are. Destroyer of waistlines. Mocking intruder upon Continental breakfasts.

My quest now is to locate the mysterious substance known to many as Spacegouda. To me, it is known as the forbidden fruit of the cow. Not too sweet. Not too mature. Therefore, in spite of my instincts, I will destroy you and all who are involved in your manufacture. You may be viewed by many as the ultimate in bovian purity but to me you are a galactic nuisance which must be obliterated!!!!

Cheese purists rejoyce, your competition is about to be reduced...