Malachai Actault

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Receipt of Destruction
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On behalf of all of us at Damaged and Knackered,
we sincerely thank you for trying to enter this particular system.
Unfortunately, we must stop you to perform an emergency hull inspection
with our certified, CONCORD approved, propolusion disabling equipment.

We are happy to inform you that our friendly and convenient services
have been successfully completed. You will notice an extreme loss of
mass and hull integrity of your ship, do not be alarmed as this is normal.

We also provide our trademarked "Instant Clone Re-location" service
free of charge, please remain still and wait for the flash. Again, we thank you for choosing Damaged and Knackered in this saturated market. If you have any questions, call 1-666-AZZ-HOLE!

Sincerly: Malachai Actault

Ship Replacement form: http://imgur.com/a/4wqZF

THE TEN COMMANDMENTS OF EVE:
1. Thou shalt not go afk unless thou wishes to lose thy ship.
2. Thou shall not smash thy computer from eve emo rage.
3. Thou shalt not mix gun types.
4. Thou shalt not shield & armor tank unless thou art looking for an ass kicking.
5. Thou shalt not steal from thy allies.
6. Thou shall not talk in local.
7. Thou shalt not Pass out while mining & care bearing.
8. Thou shall not play wanker music in TS.
9. Thou shall ignore anoying GF/wife and play EVE. Unless your Gf/wife plays EVE, then she is a goddess.
10. Thou shall clean ears out and LISTEN to the fucking FC!!!!

Build a man a fire and he will be warm for one night; SET a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

I am neither dumb, nor stupid, I simply possess the power to defy logic.