Avadon. [DO0M]

It must have been about seven, eight years ago. Me and the little lady was out on this boat, you see, all alone at night, when all of the sudden this huge creature, this giant crustacean from the Paleolithic Era, comes out of the water.

We was so scared, Lord have mercy, I jumped up in the boat, and I said, "Thomas, Thomas, what on earth is that creature?"

It stood above us looking down with these big red eyes and I yelled, I said, "What do you want from us, monster?"

And the monster bent down, and said, "I need about tree-fiddy."

I said, "I ain't givin' you no tree-fiddy, you goddamn Loch Ness Monster! Get your own goddamn money!"