Something, clever.... oh god, someone's reading this. Quick think fast. *Sweating intensifies*

Uh, get gud? Me love you long time? I'm just not that great under pressure. Please, don't judge.

*wipes hands on sweats* Oh thank god that's over. You're still here? Why must you torment me! It's glandular, okay! My serving sizes are completely approrpriate and I'm totally not a failure. I just don't buy into a corporate lifestyle. My parents love having me live with them, and my online girlfriend from the Phillipines is visiting next month which is super nice. I'm 99% sure she's a biological lady too.

Good lord you're hanging in here. So, do I like invite you over for ThanksGiving or something now? Did we just become best friends? ...Do you want to do some Karate in the garage?