Name: Rhyme-nocerous
Title: CEO of Rhino Relocation Realty
Aliases: The Freighter Whisperer | Space Truckstep Daddy | Spreadsheet Antichrist

Biography:
Birthed from a condemned cargo hold full of expired Quafe, Rhyme-nocerous clawed his way into existence during a blackout in Niarja — naked, greasy, and screaming about collateral margins. He didn’t choose logistics. Logistics chose him, because even the universe needs someone to suffer so others can keep clicking "Accept Contract" without thinking.

He is the final boss of burnout.
The holy trinity of his religion is: Max Payout, No Tank, Full Send.
He has seen the abyss — and charged it 15% collateral.

This man injects caffeine directly into his skill queue.
He’s flown freighters naked through Uedama for fun.
He once screamed "BUFFER THIS" and undocked in an unfit Mammoth with 8 billion ISK.
Spoiler: He made it.

His bookmarks have bookmarks.
His overview only shows profit and poor life choices.
He bathes in tears, taxes, and the blood of haulers who thought autopilot was “fine.”

You think you're hardcore? He’s got spreadsheets that would make your CEO weep.
Rhyme-nocerous doesn’t dodge war decs — he survives them by being too broke to kill.

EVE is a sandbox.
Rhyme-nocerous is the pissed-off toddler eating sand and screaming at the sun while hauling 80 contracts to Amarr.

He doesn’t play the game.
He freights it into submission.

If EVE had OSHA, he’d be on every watchlist.
If Concord enforced mental health, he’d be in perma-hold.
He is the reason your DST feels afraid when it’s dark in space.

Message him if you dare. Or don’t. He’s already moving your contract anyway.