Ghost of Delve

Do not come into Little Caesars and order garlic bread. We don’t have fucking garlic bread. We’ve never had garlic bread, and we probably will never have garlic bread. The only kind of bread we have is Italian cheese bread and crazy bread, neither of which features garlic. Stop looking at me like I’m an idiot when I tell you there’s no such thing as garlic bread. Look at our damn menu, do you see garlic bread? No, you don’t, you see crazy bread and cheese bread. If you tell me garlic bread I have no idea what you’re talking about, and saying it louder does not change the fact that we don’t have any fucking garlic bread. Stop making me guess which one you’re talking about, because the only similarity between garlic bread and the other two menu items is bread, which leaves what you actually want at large. I’m not going to make you any fucking garlic bread either, so either pick crazy bread or cheese bread and get on with the rest of your order. Where did you even get garlic bread from? What God convinced you that Little Caesars carried garlic bread? We’ve carried a lot of things, such as spaghetti, foot long deep dish, cheddar bites, and many other things. But is garlic bread one of them? The answer is NO since you can’t seem to figure that out for yourself. The closest thing you’ll get to garlic bread is if you ask for a zap pack with your pizza since that has your precious fucking garlic powder in it. But you probably don’t even know that since you lack the basic ability to review a menu before you order. Do you go into Burger King and order a Big Mac before realizing that you are, in fact, not at a place that sells such a consumable? Why is it that you cannot process what I say when I tell you we don’t have garlic bread? Do you think I lie about what we have?

Thanks.