Jack Russell Burton

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This is Jack Burton in the Pork Chop Express and I'm talking to whomever is listening out there.
Like I told my last wife I says "Honey, I never fly faster than I can see, besides that it's all in the reflexes."

You just listen to the old Pork Chop Express here now and take his advice on a dark and stormy night, alright?
When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, and he looks you crooked in the eye and he asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol' Jack Burton always says at a time like that: "Have ya paid your dues, Jack?" "Yessir, the check is in the mail."

I'm a reasonable guy. But, I've just experienced some very unreasonable things.

And in the vastness of this verse, Ol' Jack always says...ah what the hell.

You just listen to the old Pork Chop Express here now and take his advice on a dark and stormy night when the lightning's crashin' and the thunder's rollin' and the rain's coming down in sheets thick as lead. Just remember what old Jack Burton does when the earth quakes, and the poison arrows fall from the sky, and the pillars of Heaven shake. Yeah, Jack Burton just looks that big old storm right square in the eye and he says, 'Give me your best shot, pal. I can take it.'

Gate campers love it when you leave this in local just before escaping through the gate on them. ^_^
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Flipping off failed ganks since 2016.