Prayer to BOB, the Wormhole God

Oh mighty and unpredictable BOB,
Dweller of the deepest, most chaotic wormholes,
You who opens paths and seals exits for your own amusement,
Hear the humble plea of this lost and confused capsuleer!

You who giveth mass and taketh it away,
Who collapses our C5 at peak farming time,
And bestoweth the sacred K162 when we least expect it —
Thou art chaos, thou art profit, thou art the holy despawner of content.

Forgive my unscanned sigs,
My forgotten probes,
And that poorly saved bookmark that doomed the fleet to a fiery death.

Deliver us from the static with no content,
From the drifters roaming out of place,
And from the curse of the cowardly dual-prop Hecate.

Grant us the phat blue loot,
The juiciest Sleeper caches,
And let our scouts never roll into a crit hole at the end of the chain.

BOB, accept this sacrifice of a poorly-fit Tengu,
Burned in your honor on the altar of the next rage roll.
And turn a blind eye to our offline POS with expired fuel.

For thou art BOB,
Sovereign of Lost Sigils,
Warden of empty Dscans and full rage pings.

Amen. Critical Mass.


You play too much EVE when....

1. You have a car crash you run away to avoid been podded.
2. Someone dies in a movie you say, "Hope he had his clone up to date".
3. You get on the freeway and say, "Warp drive..active."
4. You look at the periodic chart and see "tritanium" instead of "titanium".
5. Every doorway you run towards then walk slowly to it from 15 metres away.
6. Before you get into a bar fight you orbit them.
7. You try to get out of a police ticket by asking if you can just pay the ransom.
8. You ask your boss if he can just pay you in ISK.
9. While chasing someone down the street, instead of "Stop that man" you shout "Get points on him."
10. Watching rugby league your team has 10 sec left to get the winning tri he gets the break and you start screaming OVER HEAT, OVER HEAT.