HerbTarlek

[2009.05.05 19:43:46] HerbTarlek > The germans were masters at self-discipline and control over their bodily functions and able to go entire lifetimes without a bowel movement. As elderly members died the relatives would cut them open and extract diamonds from the rectum well into the transverse colon. The diamonds were used to pay for funeral costs, dowries for unattractive grandchildren, and provisions for the surviving spouse. This era ended with greed and two controversial inventions: the German shelf toilet and the Diamantfilter (although poorer Germans often sifted through their own feces with a cheaper item known as a Bleistift). The Germans used the new technology to extract diamonds during their lifetime. Not content to wait a decade or two, they also began shitting more, which eventually decreased the pressure in their bowels to sub-diamond levels. The era of the Poopdiamanten had ended.