Thank you for calling CCP.

To make a payment please press 1.
To send us money please press 2.
To donate to our beer fund please press 3.
To buy us lunch please press 4.
To pay for our vacations please press 5.
To line our pockets with your hard earned money please press 6.
To donate your first born child please press 7.
To reach our refund department please press Ctrl Q.
To reach our pale white skinned IT department please hang up and try your call again.