Founded in the depths of a smoke-filled, low-sec cantina by "Fat" Ernie Valerius, Fat Ernie’s Tea Trading started with a simple, completely legal dream: corner the New Eden market on high-grade, highly addictive, artisanal planetary tea leaves.

Today, we are a premier interstellar logistics, distribution, and "aggressive negotiation" firm. While the Amarr Empire claims to have the monopoly on sacred leaves, and the Caldari Megacorps think they understand supply chains, Ernie knows the real truth: everyone in the cluster is stressed out, and a warm cup of Earl Grey (spiked with a mild, unregulated booster) can stop a war—or start one, depending on the profit margins.

We specialize in high-risk blockade running, exotic leaf smuggling, and providing the finest hot beverages to capsuleers who are tired of drinking recycled station water.