The Fundamental Rules of Eve:
1: Always update your clone.
2: Don't fly what you can't afford to lose.
3: Don't fly what you can't properly fit (this means medium/small guns and repairers do NOT go on battleships).
4: Watch....Fucking....Local....
5: Contrary to popular belief, you cannot take on that hostile fleet solo.
6: Fear the cloaking drake. If you don't know why, stick around and see what happens.
7: Just about any ship can fit a cyno (see #6 above).
8: The copy/paste damage hits aren't scaring anyone-really-we don't care about your omgwtf structure hits.
9: Carry both long and short range ammo.
10: That "You're entering low security space" message actually means something.
11: Remember to change autopilot settings when hauling throughout empire.
12: The scanner is your friend.
13: Combat probes are your enemy
14: Stay aligned
15: When investigating wormholes, bookmark both sides of the hole