The details of my life are moderately exaggerated... very well, where do I begin?

I was not born so much as "declared a situation" that was descirbed as "deeply avoidable". Raised by rogue drones in a poorly lit asteroid belt, I quickly learned two things:

1) Always carry lube
2) Always overheat the guns

I have been betrayed, podded, and once forced to mine Veldspar against my will. I survived. I adapted, and I bought a slightly better ship.

I have studied the ancient arts of brooding silently, pressing buttons that say “Do Not,” and standing dramatically near windows. I do not seek chaos, but I am connected with chaos on Linkedin.

I gazed into the abyss. The abyss filed a complaint.

Now I roam New Eden as a misunderstood tactical genius — some say “menace,” others say “primary.” My enemies call me dangerous. My allies call me “can you log in for this timer?”

My hobbies include dramatic warping, morally questionable contracts, and pressing F1 with emotional intensity.

You probably haven’t heard of me, and that's probably best for everyone.