"EVE is harsh on day one, and stays that way," Syncaine writes. "WoW holds your hand from 1-80, and makes sure you get a cookie regardless if you win or lose. EVE not only takes your cookie, but laughs at you for bringing one in the first place."

What to do if you find yourself stuck with no hope of rescue: Consider yourself lucky that life has been good to you so far.

Alternatively, if life hasn't been good to you so far, which given your present circumstances seems more likely, consider yourself lucky that it won't be troubling you much longer.