The Epic of Keith - an original poem



A rabbi named Keith was on a mission
To perform a circumcision

But his medical skills were inferior
And his motives were ulterior

He had no scissors, no sharp rock
It appeared he had no tool to cut a cock

He had no knife, no sharp stick
It appeared he had no way to cut a dick

He was unequipped and ill prepared
It didn’t seem like he even cared

But nothing on this earth is more damned
Then what the rabbi Keith had planned

He told a boys parents what must be done
He told them that God had spoken

But God did not take lightly this slanderous lie
And He set aside a spot in hell for Keith to fry

Where the circumcision was to be performed there gathered a crowd
To which Keith told them outloud:

“Now some of you think I’m a fool
You might think I forget to bring a tool

But you are wrong” said Keith
“I have 20 tools called teeth”

The boy pulled down his pants and set them aside
Then the rabbi opened his mouth wide

At this point everyone knew mighty well
That the rabbi himself was bound for hell

Then when God came down from out of the sky
No one ever questioned or wondered why

“Come on” God said to Keith
“We’re headed to beneath”






I hope this poem made you laugh. I also hope you spent enough time reading it that I was able to escape.