Sir, are you classified as human?
Negative, I am a meat popsicle.



The History Channel: Where the past comes to die.

There is no theory of evolution; there is just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to survive.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris has counted to infinity...twice.

Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

Chuck Norris puts the fun in funeral.

Chuck Norris puts the laughter in slaughter.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books; he stares them down until he get the information out of them.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris was once bit by a rattle snake, and after five days of agonizing pain, the rattle snake died.

If you misspell Chuck Norris in Google, it doesn't say, "did you mean Chuck Norris?," it says "Run while you still have the chance."