Here are a series of quotes or saying i found funny or profound

The stick up the butt of the stick up ~her~ butt must have a telephone pole up ~it's~ butt

Go to the top of the class and fall off

"Mistress, I'm a demon going to steal a book about Chaos for a Prince of Hell from a witch with a cartoon character as my sidekick, how will I know when things get weird?"

-"If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid."

-"If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly."
- David Hackworth

"Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons."
- General MacArthur

-"The purpose of war is not to die for your country. The purpose of war is to ensure that the other guy dies for his country."
- General Patton

“Don’t worry this is a shaped charge” “what sort of shape” “Spherical”

"Keep it simple. Kicking someone in the balls doesn't need anything more high-tech than a pair of boots"